Easier Said Than Done

Adversities show up in our lives in different shapes and sizes. Sometimes, they are small, like tiny thorns and sometimes, they come like big monsters. What remains common is how they make us feel. It's always uncomfortable. The feelings towards adversities might change, but more often than not, we change for good.

I was headed for my run this morning — going to the starting point by a train, but I didn't buy a ticket. The gamble didn't favor me — ticket inspectors walked in and gave me a fine of 60 bucks. The next steps were fairly straightforward — pay the fine and don't travel without a ticket ever again. There was nothing I could do about it, so I started my run. For the next 30 minutes, my mind was cycling through the same thought in different forms — "If only"s and "should have"s. Clearly, there was nothing I could do to change what had happened. And yet, I couldn't get my head off that petty fine. It made me question for a moment, how could a 'petty' issue like this bother me so much? A tangential thought emerged.

"Easier said than done" — that's what my friend told me recently. He'd been trying to get over a relationship, and I'd been trying to help in different ways. But at times, I would get impatient, annoyed, and question: "how can a rational man like him not understand a simple thing?". Well, just the same way I was struggling to keep my composure when dealing with such challenges. Many people tried to help, but it took me a sweet amount of time — time that felt terrible back then. I've had a fair share of challenging experiences and every single time, they felt extremely hard. Gladly, they're part of the past. But that doesn't guarantee a challenge-free future, right?

As much as we'd want our lives to go by our terms, the truth is — they don't. Just when everything seems to be going perfectly well, an adversity might show up. We can never predict it. And yet, we can be prepared. Just like a soldier is prepared for a war, even though he might not fight one in his whole life. That being said, preparing for adversities doesn't assure that handling them will be easy. We might struggle again. But when we emerge through the other side, we would be better versions of ourselves, more accepting of our lives, if not appreciative. Looking back at my life, I feel thankful for all the chapters of struggle. Each one I went through taught me a crucial lesson, and all those lessons combined have helped me become who I am today — a better person. I don't know how I'm going to react when faced with a challenge next. My reaction to a 'petty fine' wasn't great. But it could've been worse, or lasted longer than 30 minutes had I not experienced a shift of perspective. Who knows? The understanding of the fragility of human life, and the strengths we carry within ourselves, is helpful :)

Another reminder I got today was to be compassionate and supportive of my friend, who's demonstrated strength in many aspects of his life and continues to do so. The patterns of highs and lows in our lives don't always coincide with those of our loved ones. Perhaps we can be mindful of that and do our best to elevate others when they're not at their best. Because growing together and celebrating our lives with others might just feel more meaningful than celebrating our own—if that means anything.